Four Score and Seven
by GrrraceUnderfire
Summary: It was a phrase any American school child would know by heart. But did it make any sense at all to the British corporal on Hogan's team? A missing scene from "How to Catch a Papa Bear," published for the 2019 SSSWC. Received two 2020 PBA Awards: Silver for Speed Writing and Silver for Episode.


_This is a missing scene from "How to Catch a Papa Bear." Newkirk has the stutter that is canon for the German version of the show. I was wondering, wouldn't Newkirk be puzzled by a phrase that is recognizable mainly because it's part of American history? So, this…_

In the tunnel below Stalag 13, Colonel Hogan and Corporal Newkirk were reviewing their quickly devised plan. Until Kommandant Klink had ordered a surprise late-night bed check, Hogan had expected to be the one to meet the new Underground agent North Star and check him out personally. But Hogan would be missed if he was absent during Klink's midnight visit. So he decided to send Newkirk in his place.

"Right, Sir. I'll mmmeet with him at Weber's Farm and come st-straight back here," Newkirk said. "And I'll state 'four score and seven' at the start and end of any radio transmission," Newkirk said. "Not that I expect to have to send any mmmessages, Sir. Apart from the hour's walk to the farm, it sounds like a pretty routine mmmeeting."

"Good man," Hogan said. "The transmission code is just a precaution. With all the turnover in the Düsseldorf Underground recently, we don't know North Star and his crew. Chances are there's nothing to be concerned about, but I feel better knowing we have an extra layer of security. And Newkirk?"

"Yes, Sir?"

"The code is strictly between us," Hogan said.

"Understood, Guv."

"You're out of here right after roll call," Hogan said. "Clothes ready?"

"Yes, Sir. Business attire. I think I'll add a bit of gray to my hair to explain why I'm not in uniform," Newkirk. "C-colonel, wouldn't it be easy j-j-j-just to say '87'?"

Hogan crossed his arms and studied Newkirk. "Are you likely to have trouble saying the words?" He was surprised Newkirk raised it, because his stutter didn't usually trip him up when he had a script to follow.

"Nnnno, it's not that, Sir," Newkirk said with a laugh. "I can pronounce it, piece of cake. It's just a bit ffffancy is all."

"Stick with 'four score and seven,' Newkirk," Hogan replied. Then the light bulb went off. "Oh. You're not familiar with it."

"Of course I am, Sir," Newkirk replied indignantly. "I did go to sc-school, after all. Fffor a bit, anyway. A score is 20. If you mmmultiply by four and add ssssseven, you get 87."

Hogan smiled indulgently. "I have complete confidence that you can do the arithmetic, Newkirk. That's not what I meant." But he could tell from the sudden uptick in stuttering behavior that he'd touched a nerve.

Newkirk, alone among Hogan's core team, didn't have much of what you would call an education. Kinch, Carter and LeBeau had all finished high school, and Kinch and Carter even had some college under their belts. Newkirk, on the other hand, was mostly self-educated after the age of 12 from what Hogan could tell. British students were supposed to stay in school until 14, but Newkirk apparently hadn't been a rules follower even as a kid. Plus he'd mentioned being knocked around by teachers every time he stuttered, which had to be pretty often. So he just quit going. Somehow, he did keep learning, because he could quote Shakespeare and was as smart as any guy on the team.

"What I mean is that 'Four score and seven' is the opening line from a famous speech called the Gettysburg Address," Hogan explained. "By Abraham Lincoln, the 16th president of the United States.

"Oh. The one what freed the slaves, Sir?" Newkirk inquired. "Shameful bit of your American history, slavery," he added softly.

"Yes, that Lincoln," Hogan replied. "One of our greatest presidents." He thought for a moment and added, "I think all nations have episodes in history they deeply regret, Newkirk. Slavery is certainly one of ours."

Newkirk pursed his lips, as he often did when deep in thought, and nodded. "I can't argue that, Gov. We learned in school all about the great British Empire. But it's not good for everyone, is it? What about the oppression of Ireland? The mmmess we made with the Aborigines in Australia? Bloody awful th-things we done in the Boer Wars? The mmmmm, mmmassacre at Amritsar? They don't teach much about that."

"Well, listen to you, Newkirk," Hogan chuckled. "You sound like a quite a radical." The twinkle in Hogan's eyes told Newkirk he was joking, but the corporal he felt compelled to explain himself anyway.

"Not exactly a r-r-radical, Sir. I, I really don't give mmmmuch thought to politics. But I sp-spent a lot of time in the library reading when I didn't 'ave a 'ome to go to," he said with a shrug. "Especially when it was wet and c-cold." Hogan let that image sink in, of a very young Newkirk with nowhere to go but the library.

Newkirk pressed on: "So, what did this chap Lincoln have to say? Why the fancy language? Why didn't he just say 87?"

"Well, listen to the opening line," Hogan said. He recited it: "'Four score and seven years ago our fathers brought forth on this continent, a new nation, conceived in Liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal.'"

Newkirk was listening intently. "Think about it, Newkirk," Hogan continued. "It's more poetic to say four score and seven. It's elegant, noble language. Lincoln was trying to toughen the public's resolve to hold the country together by reminding him them that liberty and equality were our nation's founding principles."

"Hmmm," Newkirk said. "Big, long speech, was it? This—what did you call it?"

"Gettysburg Address. No, it's a very short speech. Just 272 words. Ten sentences," Hogan said.

"Blimey. I thought all toffs were long-winded. I mmmean, I quite like Winnie as a leader now that we're at war, but he can go on for a bit, can't 'e? And 'broad, sunlit uplands' and 'the lights of perverted science.' Heck, who'd believe that, even in wartime? I admit, he's got a nnnice turn of phrase if you've got an hour to listen. Which I suppose I did, as I was 'iding in a farm-farm-farmhouse near Dunkirk."

"Lincoln's not what you'd call a 'toff,' Newkirk. He grew up poor. He was self-educated."

"A poor lad, becoming president? Well, that's quite something, isn't it? I do like the sound of your Abraham Lincoln, Sir," Newkirk said. "All right, four score and seven it is. I'll stick to it, I promise. It does sound important, a bit like the j-job we have to do, really. But Sir?"

"Yes, Newkirk?"

"I j-just 'ope we don't have to use it, Gov."

"I'm pretty sure we'll be OK, Newkirk. But you can't be too prepared," Hogan said.


End file.
